Hilarious and Must Be Shared

Henry's screaming must have drowned out the security alarm that went off a couple of hours ago. We have a private security company that provides a guard, panic buttons in and around the house, and a seriously shrill siren that is conveniently attached right outside the kids' room.

With Len out of town, bath time is my task, and I took advantage of the kids being wet in the bath (think of a small shower stall with a 5-centimeter lip) and pulled the three-day-old band-aid off of Henry's leg. A band-aid that was not required in the first place. Anyway, it was soggy and starting to fall off (memo to Johnson & Johnson: BACK OFF on the band-aid adhesive!). So I removed it.

Henry apparently thought I had removed his big toe, and began screaming and holding his foot. This continued throughout the bath time.

As I was marching my sweet children (with Henry still howling) back through the house to their room (Len, if you're reading this, Ruby wanted to have a bath in their old bathroom), I noticed several men standing in my back yard dressed in black. I shooed the kids into their room and closed the door, not wanting them to see their mom go Sydney Bristow on some poor intruders.

Fortunately for me and them, they were from the security company. Apparently, the guard, who is filling in for our regular guard, was feeling ill and wanted to go home. So he pushed the panic button, which brought a swarm of guards armed with all kinds of fun toys. And they are not allowed to leave until they speak with the house's tenant. Finding the doors locked and hearing screaming and wailing from inside, they weren't sure what to do.

So, they called Len. In Malawi. Which prompted him to call and text me several times to see if we were all dead. After I assured the security guys we were ok, I was happy to call Len and report to him that our marriage will not end on our anniversary this year.

The power is out tonight, but I'm thankful for our inverter keeping the lights and fans on. I've seen three new varieties of creepy crawlies in our house tonight, and the mosquitoes are as grumpy as Henry. Going to call it a (very funny) day!