Reminders

This week I was reminded of where we've been with Ruby-girl, and how far we've come.

We were playing a game together, one of a set we play often that helps teach social skills. Each of these game boards has a different focus, and the one we played yesterday focused on idioms.

Usually, Ruby loves these games and begs to play one more time. Usually, she tries to stay ahead of me and finish first. Yesterday, however, she froze up after her first turn. After that, she tried to manipulate the die so that she only landed on the spaces I had just landed on and explained. Tears were in her eyes for much of the game as her chin quivered, a breath away from crying.

What was the source of her pain? You're on cloud nine! Don't spill the beans! You're on thin ice! Cut it out!

These and other sayings that are such a part of our daily life were terrifying to Ruby, because in her literal understanding of the world she has no idea what people mean by saying such things. In our game, players land on a space and explain what people really mean when they say, "Your eyes are bigger than your stomach!" or whatever the idiom.

A couple of times, her answer was, "it means they don't like you". This broke my heart as I realized how confusing life can still be for my little girl who has worked so hard for each step of progress. Social cues that are effortlessly understood by most children must be studied and learned by others. For these children (and adults!), navigating social situations can feel like an endless test they are constantly on the verge of failing.

So I sat there yesterday, trying to explain simply yet logically why someone would say, "You're in hot water!" to someone who was not actually being burned by hot water. Or why, when someone says, "Time to hit the books!" they really mean it's time to study or read, not that you should hit the books with your hands.

And I remembered other places we've been with Ruby:

• temporary bouts of paralysis
• seizures
• huge regressions in development
• specialists and tests with no answers
• being given a variety of grim labels for our child
• tears and prayers and hurting hearts
• amazing therapists of many kinds
• going on a diet the 'professionals' said wouldn't work
• seeing the diet help our daughter dramatically
• reading research for hundreds of hours
• praying and praying and praying some more
• searching for and finding a homeopath skilled in helping children like Ruby
• being amazed with the progress we saw from said homeopathy
• making great friends who share this journey

By the grace of God, Ruby's made so much progress, and I'm thankful for that. Today was a good reminder that we're not done making progress.

After that round of Idioms, there was no "Just one more game" from Ruby. I left it out, however, hoping she would look at it in her free time.

Tonight, as she and Henry were playing before bed, being silly and pretending to discipline each other, Ruby went to the table where the game board was. After a few seconds, she declared, "Henry, you're in hot water!"

My heart is a little more joyful tonight.